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A Fable about Flattery

A canny patron o' de masses, Bruno Da Silk was a living legend - his every sponsorship was a guaranteed slam dunk of success. This day, full-fleshed and bearing an unclean smell, the fourth moocher to make appeal had a flat sallow face that was generally unpleasant despite the intrigue in her scummy smile, and a slyness that dominated her red-rimmed baby blues.

"What's your name, ma'am?" asked Bruno Da S.

"Sally Simper, Sir."

"How can I help you?"

"I wish to be lithe of body-mass and compassionate as you are, Sir."

"Okay, er, Sally," said a flabbergasted Bruno Da. "Two questions. First, why do you deserve this, and second, how do you propose I arrange your rather extraordinary request?"

"Well, Sir Bruno, I've closely followed your career and have done research far and wide on your exceptional generosity. I've considered every fact and facet of your incredible personality that's been published anywhere. The truth is, Sir, that eccentric or not, you are kindhearted to an extreme. So I've come to think that my request could be just the proper challenge for you," said Sally Simper, her slimy smile gone smug.

"Well done, by Dammit! Very well done," exclaimed Bruno Da S. "Research is always helpful. But on days like today I prefer my beggars humble! Now go away!"

Which, with urgings and assists from his impressive Security team, Miz Sally Simper sadly did.

Moral: Sometimes it's not Appearance but Attitude.

(c) Kelvin Christopher James